So finally here it comes. This blog will be dedicated to the trip that Pierre, Megan, and I ventured on last Sunday, the 20th, and came back to NY on wednesday morning... like 7AM morning. So much has happened every day on this trip, that I will attempt to split up the blogs by day. This could either become a great story, or it can become an utter catastrophy. Here goes...

Day 1 - Sunday - Day of Departure
So the trip started off as PZ drove up to my house and gave the classic *beep* *beep*. Decided to come out and actually came inside for a brief moment meeting my parents once again. Then off we go, heading towards nowhere else but to Katonah, NY. Hitting some traffic on the cross bronx expressway, Pierre had a goal ever since the beginning of the trip, which was to NOT ask, look, or seek for directions, even if it means getting lost and driving around aimlessly for an hour and half. Not for even the slightest bit did I ever suspect that this would be the cause of what I would say one of the greatest and most ridiculously amazing and hilarious adventures I had ever embarked on.

So now we're closing in on Megan's territory, and I mean territory because it would be wrong and invalid to call it Megan's house. Rather it is her "land". You have to ask her how many acres it is rather than how many rooms you have. So anyway, me and pz in the car, and I'm testing Pz about the directions as he claims so confidently and nonchalantly that he knows exactly where it is, and he needs not such primitive assistance. So I ask him, "What's the name of that sign where we have to make that important left?".
"THORNBUSH!"... once again... "THORN BUSH!!!"
Meanwhile I'm looking at the mapquest directions, and I see right in front of me the words "Twin Knolls". It was a time for laughter, the very moment the words "thornbush" rolled off his full, juicy, suculent lips. It was great, and it added itself onto the list of inside jokes that we would bring up every once in a while during Boston. Where the hell do you get thorn bush? What is a thorn bush? Bush with thorns?

So we picked up Meggo from her beautiful land and we make our way up to Boston. Of course we had to stop for gas before actually heading out onto the highway considering pz's small yet oh so strong willed Honda Civic made it all the way from my house, exit 44 on the LIE, all the way to Megan's domain in Katonah, NY, in Thorn Bush, I mean Twin Knolls, meanwhile the car's gas meter was basically on empty the whole time. The little engine that could... It was amazing I tell you. But we thought the car deserved a lil bit of fuel. Let me just say that this station was the only bright light within miles, and when that's the case, you get swarms and swarms of bugs and flys and moths and everything else out there. Another one of the unforgettable and great events that occurred on this trip... As me and pz open the doors to get back into the car, a big moth of some sort decided to come on in with us along with a bunch of other smaller flying creatures. Me and pz flip out, start screaming like little kindergarden baby girls that forgot our barbie dolls at home, and scurry to get outta the car as fast as possible. The best thing bout this is not our high pitched girly helpless screaming, but Megan's in the back seat trapped inside the car while there are flying creatures inside that me and pz are tryin to get away from. I look at Meggo in the back, and she's just laughing histerically. I couldn't understand it. Creatures, inside, trapped, and she's having the best time of her life back there. I guess somewhere before all this happened, I went to the side to have cigarette while picking one flower from the garden. Fate has tooken place once again, as this flower ultimately became the only weapon that I could use to battle this mothy creature on pz's rearview mirror. I'm here tryin to fight the creature and knock it away with my fearsom flower, pz's standing on the other side helpless defenseless, and Meggo's in the back seat laughing histerically. I was in utter awe. What a way to start off the trip.

We stop by the next available McDonald's to grab some food before hittin the real road. Girlscouts or girl softball players, decide to laugh just as we enter through the door and look our way. "Okay" we say. We sit down, eating, and eventually a worthy conversation arises when pz starts talking about crabs or was it craps? Neither me nor meggo could tell. Then he asks if we ever went fishing for craps... Basically, have we ever gone Crap Fishing? Long story short, I've never heard such a ridiculously hilarious statement like that in a long time. I couldn't help myself, and then I just lost it along with the others, and we found ourselves working out those abs again laughing so hard where it hurts and breathing ceases to continue. One of those you had to be there and hear it kinda situations. CraP Fishing?!?! .... seriously........

OK... last paragraph and this is where I link the statement I said earlier about pz refusing any kinda of outside assistance for directions. Probably the greatest grand finale to such an eventful and fun day. We hit Massachusetts and are on some highway gettin to Martin's place. We pass over Tobin bridge without even knowing what bridge it was at the time, don't know if we're going the right way. "Woah, I think this is the Big Dig!" says PZ. We're lookin for Callahan Tunnel and Logan Airport. No directions from anybody. PZ thinks the blair witch is after us and screwing up all our directions because by now we crossed over a bridge, over another small bridge, are driving around in some neighborhood that looks like a scene from the movie Judgement Night, looking for street signs, but Boston doesn't believe in street signs, Revere Beach Blvd. or Ocean Ave. but how can we know with no street signs, are we even close to martin's place?, "we could be in a completely different area with similar street signs", end up backtracking, crossing over Tobin bridge again paying two dollar toll, see the highway we're supposed to get on, "WOOHOO, we found it guys!!!", realize we're crossing over the saME bridge that we just came back on meaning this is our 3rd time over it within the last 15 minutes. Oh wow, we're in the same intersection as we were 10 minutes ago. Decide to go the other way. We're going in circles... "Corvettes!!!", pz says for the third time as we pass by the local Corvettes dealership. We decided that mapquest wasn't going to be on our side so we ended up following the closest thing we knew about Martin's location. Revere and Beach. We see a sign that has both words on it and follow it. Somehow and some way, we ended up seeing Martin's street Nahant Ave. and the street lit up with golden flames and bright lights (not really) as we cheered and commemorated ourselves for mission well done and success, To find Martin's place w/o Directional Assistance. Mission Accomplished. Delays? About an hour and a half, but it was well worth the time, because every minute of those ninety minutes was filled with adventure and peril.

Our reward? We found Martin's Place on our own. He thinks we're still lost and trying to find his place. PZ calls him and asks him to come meet us somewhere. We wait by his car, and as Martin approaches his car.
"MARTIN!!!!!!!"
"OOH GEEZE AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

WOOHOO!!! Mission well done bostonians! Day One Complete...

Being indecisive is probably one of the most stressful and frustrating things...

relationships...

So I was talking to a friend today about it, and I bet everybody in the world can write long vague essays about it. Probably why there are so many books dealing with it. Ever find yourself in one? just sorta happened outta nowhere. Didn't expect it or look around for it? Or maybe you were the chaser and life couldn't have been any more exciting with a new motivation in your life. Maybe I might see her in the local Starbucks today, so I better dress well. Maybe if I walk this way, I might bump into her. There are about a million ways that people get into relationships and for millions of different reasons. I'll call the friend that I talked to today, Friend MC just for reference. I believe that there are vaguely two sides to a particular part of someone's personality. I'm sure everybody has heard of it before, thought about whether or not you are feeler or a thinker. Feelers being the kinda person that tends to rely on their inner feelings and emotions...the kinda people where it is just instinctual to "follow your heart". "I don't like someone. Why? I don't know. I just don't. I didn't get a good feeling" says the feeler. I am not a FeeLer and neither is MC. Thinkers are the type of people that tend to think about things, alot more than they have to many times, about everything. When making decisions, or trying to understand "WHY?" is probably second nature to thinkers. Perfect example would be the oracle in the Matrix, who inpires and informs Neo that decisions were already made and that the only thing left to figure out is why. If I were to guess, I'd say most people that I know were thinkers like myself. It's ironic though to hear somebody that thinks about everything describe what they think and their opinion by starting off with the infamous "I feel like...". It's actually kinda funny, cuz I do it all the time now also. I'd say in my opinion though that it's a hell of a lot harder to be feeler than a thinker because of the fact that feelings are irrational and vague and unreasonable. Emotions run through us every day and we feel them, but we can't prove them. How do you argue with somebody about something when all you have is your feelings? You just can't win. In a relationship where a girl has nothing but her feelings telling herself that this relationship is right, but nothing else, how can she convince the guy and show her how she really feels and what she sees? That situation would just be horrible and the girl is the one that end up getting hurt and jaded.

MC is a hardcore thinker, more than I, probably one of the most mechanically minded and thinker that I know so far. MC needs everything in his/her life to make sense. It was interesting to hear because I think that's how I'd want it as well. For everything in my life to be there or happen for a reason. If something doesn't make sense in my life, it creates a bit of anxiety and stress, because then I would have to think and think and think about why, and what the reason is as to why this is happening or why I am like this. I need that reason. I guess my whole need for explanations hasn't been as apparent to me until I actually heard MC talkin bout it. Third person perspective on things is great. I realize that without reason, without knowing why, that's when life starts to become vague and obscure. Losing track of what I need to do, of priorities, of people. I'm still tryin to figure out what the whole point of all this blabber is, and I know it has something to do with relationships and why the fact that me being a thinker affects me in relationships or the dynamics of it. MC didn't understand why in a relationship people do unsensible things and why people go through so much, or put up with so much. "It just doesn't make sense", says MC. I agreed. It really doesn't. It was giving MC so much anxiety though just even talking or thinking about it, and it seemed frustrating. Love is irrational though, and it doesn't make sense. But there needs to be a balance between love and thinking, balance between feeling and thinking, between emotions and logic, between irrationality and rationality. So I'm worried that whatever relationship I get into, I'm gonna think way too much and not let my emotions have any say. Or my emotions will just take over and I won't think about things enough. I just can't find the balance, and I don't know if I ever will. Love doesn't make sense, and because it doesn't, I don't know if it'll eVer make sense to me. I'll constantly and constantly be searching for valid and logical reasons, when there isn't one, and it'll just be the end of me.

I think I wrote too much because I'm just lost. My thoughts are all scattered and there ain't no way I'm gonna collect and organize them anytime soon. I think too much though, thats one thing. So I should stop...

hmmm...

This will be my second time blogging on my very new blog site, and nobody has yet to see it let alone even know that it even exists. Ever wonder why or try to explain why it feels different to blog on a site that u know nobody even knows about? I feel compelled to just write whatever I think I feel like writing, but at the same time, knowing that this will eventually become a public blog, there's always that sense of hesitation and precaution that I must always consider before I start pushing any keys with my fingers. What's too revealing, or what's unappropriate to write? Tactlessness? Does everybody questoin these things as well before writing or is it just me or rather just a few? Sometimes... actually many times I think I worry too much about what other people think about things and about me. I wish I could just let it go, but I find myself constantly and repeatedly pondering the same questions over and over again. It's a fear of something or many things. But I'm sure that I ain't the only one that suffers from this. So I'm just puttin it out there because I think it actually takes more effort to hide it.

I remember the first time I ever started becoming interested in astrology and other people's astrological signs and animals as well as my own. I definitely went through a stage where I might admit that I was maybe a tad bit overly anxious about star signs and their connections, meanings, and validity. I mean if you think about it, it's not so impossible to believe considering that we all are part of this universe and are connected some way with it. Some people are hardcore against it, but why not just go with it or get what u can outta it. Well the whole point was that I remember that one of the first times I read my profile as a Capricorn, there was a statement in there near the end stating that at one of my biggest fears is having enemies because I know that it'll make my path harder to reach. And so I try to do all that I can to avoid making them. There couldn't have been a more valid statement than that, and it's true and it's right. Where am I going with this? Well isn't that what blogs are for? Isn't that the greatness and enjoyment that is contained and comes with the action of writing? To be able to write about something without having any direction or idea about where or what it is leading up to. Well that'll be all for today. My fingers are sweaty...

First time for everything

So here it is... my first time blogging ever, and i think why? Sometimes i think conformity, sometimes i think boredom, and there's also the possibility that a certain close friend specifically asks and almost indirectly forces you to create one... but whatever it is, its probably what gets me through each day and what makes me who i am. Can't run away from it. It's like the matrix says... its everywhere. Influence, persuasion, pressure... conformity. Why we all tend to do what other people do? Dead Poets Society was a great movie and still is. Question is what do we do with it? Is it wrong... is it morally wrong to go with and follow the crowd, follow the other 30 kids walking a certain way, acting a certain way, dressing a certain way... or is that being unoriginal, and boring? My take is that u just need balance between the two. Ideally, if u think bout it, everything is all about balance. George Lucas knows it as u can see the way he incorporated it into his movies... star wars... bout how there needs to be a balance in the force. Being able to balance your life is by far the hardest thing that i find myself trying to do hundreds of times. It's everywhere. Balance between fun and school, balance between friends and family, balance between girlfriends and friends, balance between friends and friends (not a typo)... By balancing, it means choosing sometimes between two things that u dont want to choose from, but u have to. Like the oracle says, u have to make a choice, and then try to understand why u made that choice.

Now here's when u know that journals and blogs are a great thing. Because you're inclined to write in the blog about one thing, and by the end you look back at your entry and realize that you just wrote a whole lot of shit about something you didn't even plan on writing or thinking about.
well, let this be a reminder to me that our minds ARE free, like a bird free to roam and fly anywhere and everywhere it pleases. Probably the greatest and most precious gift given to us by who knows. Our minds have no boundaries as to what it may think about, and for that, I am content.